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What Is A Woman To Do When The Men She Loves Breaks His Promise To Her?

scaredtolove

What Is A Woman To Do When The Man She Loves Breaks His Promise To Her?

As young girls we are taught to fall in love, get married, and live happily ever after. The real world tells us a different story. As women who experienced heartache, we learn to longer trust and believe. Well ladies we need to put our big girl panties and deal with it and move forward when the man you were so much in love with breaks his promise to you.

Ladies let us analyze the reason we hold on to every word a man whispers in our ears or simply say out loud. Did we ever think or imagine he was only telling us what we desired to hear? Did we really know what he said was “BS” but made a bad choice and ignored it? The answer maybe we are hopeful that he will keep his promise. There is nothing wrong with being hopeful. But ladies we must also remember we do not have the power to change a man to do better.  All we can honestly do is do better on how we react to his broken promise to us.

For example, when a man tells you he loves you and wants to be with before sleeping with him, you believe him. When he stops calling you after he sleeps with you, the heartache begins and you say things you later regret. You do things that make you end up the fool and not him. He is having fun with the next woman. Instead of succumbing to acting like a fool syndrome, take it as a lesson learned and move on. Forgive yourself and him and move on. If you don’t, you will become an angry and bitter woman. B You must follow your gut instincts when you sense a man is going to break his promise to you. Do not play the victim role and tell your sad story to the next man. He may use it against you. Please do not give the man who contributed to your heartache make you believe all men will hurt you. That is not true. There are good men out there. You have to be the one to love yourself first to attract that good man.

Make a promise to yourself to believe you are a Queen and deserve to be treated like one. Never break that promise to yourself. When you do, it will be hard for a man to break his promise to you.

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When It Comes To Female Orgasms, It’s Literally The Thought That Counts

organsism

When It Comes To Female Orgasms, It’s Literally The Thought That Counts

 

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What She Wants In Bed

whatshewantsinbed

Men try to figure it out, but many don’t get it. Does she want candles lit for romantic lighting, or candle wax dripped on her nipples? Does she want to be made love to softly with feeling, or f*cked from behind with mad passion? I asked 1,000 women what they really wanted from men in the bedroom. They got real. The got raw. And they got honest.

Counting down from #10 — 

 

10. Foreplay. And it begins outside the bedroom. 

“He just starts. We walk in the bedroom, and he expects me to just flip on my back, automatically be wet, and ready for him to start thrusting.” —Monica F.

“I’m not an outlet that can just be PLUGGED INTO.” —Deb G.

“Make me want you!” —Fran T.

“A man’s intelligence is a HUGE turn-on for me.” —Juanita G.

 

For some men, there are two types of foreplay: being touched and the anticipation of being touched. What these guys don’t seem to realize is that their version of foreplay is in direct opposition to a woman’s largest erogenous zone: her mind. There’s no substitute for mental stimulation and intelligent discussion as foreplay.

Arousal for a woman often starts long before she is consciously aware it is happening. She is turned on by a look… by a statement… by his wit… even his willingness to listen without judgment. Seduction is an art form, and requires effort. It demands focus on her. She wants to feel important. She wants to matter. She wants to feel desired.

Bottom line: A woman’s largest erogenous zone is her mind, with his words and actions being the ultimate tools for effective foreplay.

 

9. Undress her… slowly.

“I want to be slowly unwrapped and revealed, like a present.” —Debbie B.

“He needs to take his time with me until I can’t handle it. And I want to see him want me. It drives me crazy.” —Michelle S.

Too often, couples get down to business. And while that really works on many occasions, that’s raw passion. Seduction can—and should— also be slower, and not rushed. Reveal her body slowly and let your eyes and hands hover, brush, caress, and grip places your tongue will soon follow.

Bottom line: Anticipation and appreciation go a long way.

 

8. Sex in public.

“The possibility of being caught or seen is a huge turn-on for me. We don’t have to have full penetration, but getting close works great. I’ve started going out without panties on so he can start things wherever we are.” —Erika D.

She might not want to actually have sex in public (getting arrested isn’t good), but the thrill of being observed is a huge turn-on for many women. After all, part of the excitement when you’re a teenager is not getting caught doing… whatever. Why would that change in adulthood?

To the guy who thinks his girl “wouldn’t be like that”: Yes, your girl, too.

 

7. Let her take control.

“I really like being in control. Not every time, but sometimes. And I don’t want to hurt him; I just want to do things to him. Things that please him, but also things that let him know he is not in control; I am.” —Karen W.

Power can be a big aphrodisiac for many people, men and women alike. And just like their male counterparts, many women want to not be on the receiving end of control. While most respondents weren’t looking for a BDSM lifestyle, over half (53%) were just as clear that they wanted their man to experience some level of submission, at least one time—tie him up, spank him, have access to all parts of him. And others (9%) were looking to have the same power as a man—where it wasn’t enough for her to be on top… she wanted him on the bottom.

Bottom line: She has just as much desire as he does… and she wants the opportunity to show him.

 

6. Role-play

“I love when he dresses up in his old Navy uniform. I didn’t know him then, so it makes things different, and men-in-uniform really turn me on.” —Jessie L.

“My husband has a foot fetish. When I wear stockings and heels, he loses his mind.” —Erica M.

“Maybe I’m all screwed up, but I like playing the naughty school girl (with pigtails!), and he’s the teacher who punishes me for getting my homework wrong.” —Hanna R.

Taking on a different persona can be freeing and allow for actions and thoughts to play out that you as a “real person” wouldn’t be able to follow-through with. By putting on a costume or assuming a different role, you can kill off inhibitions and self-conscious insecurities that would prevent pleasure.

Bottom line: Assuming a new role can not only be fun, it can eliminate relationship dynamics that might stifle sexual freedom.

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Women Must Stop Chasing Men and Let The Men Do All The Chasing!

dontchase

Women Must Stop Chasing Men and Let The Men Do All The Chasing!

 

It is a different world today where women are more independent and aggressive. Women are competing with men for the same positions.  Women are running major corporations and doing a great job at it.  However, some women are not doing a great job in attracting men or getting their attention because they are chasing them.

 

Most women seem not to have a care in the world about asking a man out and being the first one to call a man after a first date.  Some of these women will actually sleep with a man on the first date hoping to develop a relationship with a man.  Most women seem to have forgotten to allow the man to be the one to do all the chasing.

 

I believe women of today should take some lessons from women of yesterday who behaved like ladies.  They wore clothes that actually covered their bodies and refused to kiss a guy on the first date.  Women back then did not make the first call to the man they liked.  They waited by the phone for the man to call. The men were the ones who did all the asking and paid for the dinner.  According to Beth S, M.D the author of Dating Rules, stated “Men did the asking a lady simply didn’t ask a gentleman out. She didn’t call him either, unless he called her first. Girls and women really did sit by the phone, waiting for a man to call. Plus, with no cell phones, voicemail, or caller I.D., you’d have to be home if you wanted to know he’d called.”

The men back then also were the ones who would go out of their way to pick up the woman to go out on the date he planned.

 

  I think the reason women seem to be doing more of the chasing is they feel the clock is ticking and they have to rush to the alter with their man.  Most Women want the wedding of their dreams and family so some feel they have to control everything to make it happen for them.

 

Most women are insecure with themselves and they have the desire to be needed.  When a woman is insecure, she will do anything and everything to try and get the man to propose to her and that is what we as women should not do is chase a man.

 

Women need to have more self-respect, love, and confidence within them.  If you know you are sexy, beautiful, intelligent, and strong then the man you are trying to attract will know it as well and will chase you.

 

Most men view women who chase them as being desperate or “thirsty” and that can be a turn off to them.  It has been said so many times men love a challenge and I think that is true.  Some men will not pay attention to someone who makes themselves easy to get and too available.  The best thing to do ladies is to always let the men chase you.

 

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Do Men Lose Respect for Women on First Date Sex?

firstdatesex

At some point during Steve Harvey’s “reign of terror,” there was an intense debate on the politics of when a woman should feel comfortable enough to sleep with a man of her choosing. The rhetoric at that time period stated a woman should enforce a 90-day rule in order to not lose the respect of the man she wanted to sleep with. The rule was also suggested to allow a woman time to properly assess whether the man in question actually liked her for her, or just liked her for sex. I was a relatively young lad at the time thinking to myself, “do mean really disrespect women if they sleep with them on the first date?” The short answer, per usual, is it depends on the man in question, but it bears writing that I have never actually seen this line of thinking in action.

In my personal conversations with men sleeping with women after a first date, I haven’t really heard anything negative.  Sleeping together quickly doesn’t cancel out the chance for a relationship, her “worth” as a woman hasn’t been affected in a negative manner, and it hardly ever amounts to anything more than, “the date was great so we ended up having sex afterward.” Because I’ve seen that side of this particular situation so frequently it really hadn’t dawned on me that men felt the opposite way until I got a little older. So let’s address that.

Men who judge women for having sex with them on the first date are allowed to do so, although I’m not sure how they reconcile having less respect for a woman they chose to sleep with on a first date when they were active participants. For women, I’d imagine it’s a bit hard to tell when those are the men they’re choosing to sleep with (which may lend credence to Steve Harvey’s much maligned/celebrated plan to wait and see).  In any event, I’m of the opinion a man judging a woman’s ability to make an adult decision based on the timeliness of sex, likely has his own issues regarding either sex or women’s sexuality. That might seem like a stretch, but when you consider the fact a man in this situation is essentially placing the blame solely on the woman and sees her as “less than” while not penalizing himself for doing the same, it doesn’t exactly speak highly of him. Women ought to be more cognizant of situations like that, but given the patriarchal society we live in, unfortunately, too many women will place the blame on themselves as well.

Switching gears a bit, I’d like to provide another perspective on this situation too. Over the course of my years on this Earth, I’ve heard a number of women assume that the reason a man didn’t want to date them after they had sex on the first date is because he no longer respected them. Being on the other side of that conversation as well, I can say the answer to that perception is a tad bit more varied than women would like to believe. In some cases, it isn’t really a problem of sleeping with a woman on the first date, rather the sex was weak so he simply opted not to further engage in the relationship anymore. In other cases, I’ve heard men say there were interested in a woman but the situation (as often happens in dating) just fell apart and never grew into anything. I say that to say there are times where women might attribute early sex as the reason why a man no longer wanted to date them when in reality it was something else entirely.

Suffice it to say there are men out there who no longer respect women after they have sex with them on the first date. There are also men out there who have loved and married women they slept with on the first date. There isn’t a universal answer on this topic. Chances are, if a man is penalizing a woman for having sex on the first date, he probably has a deeper issue which likely has nothing to do with women in general and everything to do with the society he grew up in and how thinks the actions of women should be dictated. In some cases, lack of respect after sex on the first date may not be why the relationship never matured. There were other factors, but that just happened to be the easiest one to point to.

– See more at: http://madamenoire.com/447533/first-date-sex/#sthash.IE6fOaeS.dpuf

 

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Don’t Be Used By Your Man!

menwhouseyou

YOU ARE BEING USED

When he drops you off at work everyday and takes your car, you are being used.

When within 3 months of meeting he moves into YOUR home, you’re being used.

When he borrows money from you and never pays it back, you’re being used.

When he lives in your house and doesn’t pay any bills, you’re being used.

When he cheats on you and you know about it, you are being used.

Ladies, you should never let anyone use you. You can do bad all by yourself. When you know better, you do better. You are too great of a person to let someone, anyone, walk all over you like a doormat and use you.

By Anthony’s Words of Wisdom

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